"Surrendering to Depression: Beyond the Blues"

“Many of life’s failures are the people who didn’t realize

how close they were to success when they gave up.”

Thomas Edison

Many individuals have experienced moments of sadness or low mood in their lives. Some may even have encountered depression, either personally or through someone they know. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), approximately 5% of adults worldwide suffer from depression.

The most prevalent symptoms associated with this disorder encompass low mood, diminished motivation, a pervasive sense of hopelessness, an inability to derive pleasure from activities, and the presence of negative thoughts directed towards oneself, others, and the world. However, it's important to recognize that depression extends beyond mere sadness. The challenge with this disorder lies not solely in experiencing feelings of despondency, hopelessness, or a lack of motivation initially, but rather in how individuals respond to these emotions and the circumstances that triggered them in the first place.

Comprehending the mechanisms of depression and identifying the factors that can exacerbate it, particularly the coping strategies or attempted solutions, is essential for effectively assisting individuals in overcoming the profound sense of despair often associated with depression. It provides the necessary insight to guide them out of the emotional abyss that they may feel trapped within.

We all possess beliefs about ourselves and our capabilities to navigate life, as well as beliefs about the people in our surroundings and the world we inhabit. These beliefs can range from "I can achieve it" to "my colleagues don't like me" or "the world is a perilous place." In some instances, individuals have long-held negative beliefs about their competence, while in others, the initial belief may be positive, such as "I can do it." However, specific situations where the desired outcomes are not achieved can sow doubt about our initial beliefs, eventually causing them to crumble like a house of cards. Life events like breakups, job terminations, the loss of a friendship, and so forth, serve as prime examples of occurrences that can challenge our belief system. Successes and failures play a role in shaping these initial beliefs.

Depression often arises as a result of the collapse of an initial belief that the individual once held to be true, only to discover that they were mistaken. Consequently, the person may feel like a victim—someone who has been let down by themselves, by others, or by a traumatic event beyond their control. In all these cases, the individual assumes the role of a victim as a means of self-protection, an attempt to halt their suffering. Unfortunately, this self-protection can manifest as giving up or ceasing to make an effort.

Resignation is a prevailing coping response among individuals grappling with depression. Those who opt for resignation often feel drained, as though they've exhausted their efforts and still haven't achieved their desired outcomes. They may perceive it as losing the final battle in an ongoing war. Consequently, they surrender, believing they have no energy left to continue the fight and that protecting themselves from further pain is the only option, even if they are patiently waiting for the final blow. As Honoré de Balzac aptly put it, "Resignation is a daily suicide."

However, this resignation perpetuates a vicious cycle. By giving up, individuals reinforce their sense of incompetence, sinking deeper into their negative self-beliefs. This cycle continues as they cease trying, feed their negative beliefs, and experience worsening moods, further fuelling their depression.

In my clinical practice, I often encounter the self-deception that goes hand in hand with depression: the belief that "once I feel better, I will start taking action again." This thinking traps individuals in a cycle of low mood and lack of motivation. It's akin to deciding to take vitamin supplements only when vitamin levels are already optimal, rather than when they are deficient. The more accurate approach should be: "once I start taking action, I'll begin to feel better."

Therapy can assist individuals in taking that crucial first step to reactivate their dormant internal engine, much like the phoenix rising from its own ashes.

If you feel that you've given up and require assistance, please don't hesitate to reach out to me.

Related readings:

"Las caras de la depresión", E. Muriana, L. Petteno, T. Verbitz (Spanish Edition).

(No English edition is available for this book)